"No, no, no, Jared 7763! Let go of the logical choice and let your emotions take over. Look at this cute puppy. Don't you want to take him home with you? He could be your best friend," my teacher coaxed me to hold the squirming bundle close to the electric circuitry board in my chest.
It's important to know that I am a cyborg. I have the body of a teen-aged human male and the brain, eyes, and heart of a computer. I am in the last month of school before I can begin my job serving and protecting the public. If someone had asked me last month, I would have said it finishing school would have been simple, but that was before they gave me emotions.
Logic is simple, clean, and free from distractions while emotions are utterly complicated, ever changing, and occasionally debilitating. My teacher keeps pushing, trying to bring my emotions to the surface while I continue to try to suppress them.
Looking down at the brown and white spotted mini-mongrel, I repeated to myself that this feeling of warmth running through me was illogical. More than likely this canine creature was about bite me.
The creature in question lifted it's head and looked soulfully through his brown eyes into my cold, glassy eyes and urinated all over my chest.
I placed the dog on the floor as sparks flew and the smell of my overheating motherboard filled the air as the dog barked madly at me.
"Oh, dear," my teacher said rather insincerely. "How is that making you feel Jared 7763?"
"I need to temporarily shut down my processors and analyze my systems for damage," these were the obvious steps to preventing a massive system shutdown. I began doing a self check of my systems while I removed my shirt and began to rinse it in one of the sinks along the wall of the classroom. The dog followed me, nipping at my shoelaces.
"True, that, definitely should be done, but how does it make you feel? What are you emotions telling you? Are you angry, frustrated, embarrassed?" She tilted her head to one side, smiling at me, hoping for a breakthrough I guess.
Calmly and evenly I said, "You know, I think I am feeling a bit of irritation toward this situation, but mostly I feel that the logical step is to clean up and find a new shirt."
She sighed, "Well, I guess that is some progress. You may head home now, Jared 7763."
I put on my damp shirt and turned toward the door, when she stopped me, "Don't forget to take the dog with you. He is your homework for tonight. Take care of him and give him a name."
I'm not sure what happened. One minute I had all my emotions tucked neatly away and the next they were making me lash out.
"You've got to be kidding me!" I shouted and my eyes literally turned red as my weapon system responded to my heated emotion. I closed my eyes and reached for control and pushed my emotions back into the slot reserved in my hard drive for them. Couldn't she see that emotions made me dangerous and weak?
Apparently not...
"Great job! Explore these emotions and others throughout the evening and report back tomorrow. Don't forget to name him. It's very important," she handed me a red dog leash and she slipped out of the door.
I pointed my laser weapon at the dog and booted it up, but I knew that was not what she meant by exploring my emotions, so I powered down and clipped the leash to the canine's collar and left the school building.
The puppy followed obediently through the building, stopping occasionally to smell a computer console or other item When he started to lift his leg, I quickly pulled its leash to prevent the urination from happening again until we got outside.
Once outside, after he had done his duty, we traveled south toward my dwelling.
"Oh, what an adorable puppy!" A young woman coming towards me exclaimed as she knelt down letting the dog lick her hands and face. "What's his name?"
"He doesn't have one," I replied.
She frowned at me, "Well, he needs a name. How will you train him or call him if he doesn't have a name?"
"If it would please you, you can name him," I said.
"Oh, I couldn't do that. He's your dog, so you need to name him. Just observe him and name him something that suits his personality. Good luck," she gave the dog one more pat and suddenly I realized she was wishing the dog luck, not me.
We arrived at my loft, really just two rooms a small kitchen/living area and bedroom. The dog followed me around the rooms, its brown eyes watching, hoping for a pat or a treat. I observed him as he sniffed everything, sat on the furniture, and ate half of my beef chips for dinner, but no name came to me.
I began to feel twitchy, and I realized I was annoyed that I would not be able to complete my homework. Perhaps they would fail me for this, and I would be decommissioned before I even had the chance to serve the public. The twitchiness grew, and I realized I was angry. I began to pace the room, and my hands curled into fists. I threw myself down on the bed and pounded the mattress in rage. I wanted to destroy something. This is why emotions were bad; they were uncontrollable and devastating. I closed my eyes and reached back, making a fist to pound through the wall when something wet touched my hand.
Startled, I opened my eyes, and there was the dog licking my hand and practically smiling at me with his tongue hanging out. He nudged my hand, and he jumped up next to me on the bed. Turning in a full circle, he lay down next to me, so he could look at my face and lick my arm at the same time. Suddenly I could feel my anger drain away. I awkwardly patted the dog on the head.
This engaged another part of his body as his tail began to wag and thump on the bed. He quivered with joy as I patted him again on the head. I ran a search of my database running through and discarding thousands of possible names in a millisecond.
"Beattie," I said, and the dog yipped. Wagging furiously and smiling. "Beattie comes from the Latin language and meaning bringer of joy." I leaned back, closed my eyes, all the while petting my dog...and smiling.
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